EP 02: How Self-Leadership Saves You From The Relentless Drive To Succeed with Dr. Richard Schwartz

podcast May 29, 2020

My body was telling me to take a step back and reevaluate. 

Five years ago I had pneumonia and I couldn’t really do anything other than prop myself up on the couch and breathe...⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
...breathe and think about how I ended up in this mess.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
I’d run myself into the ground. My schedule was full-to-overflowing. My life was packed and stretched to the edges. I had no margin for error, no space to breathe, no time to connect to who and what mattered to me.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
What was I really chasing? Why had I packed my life so full? What was really driving me to try to be all the things to all the people?⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
The trauma of betrayal, abuse, shame, and the constant search to prove myself worthy–it was humbling and frustrating to see these recurring struggles and how they were hijacking my drive.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
I needed to do more work to lift those burdens, so I could move forward in a way where my drive was aligned to what matters most to me instead of taking me further away.

In the last episode, Jonathan Merritt and I talked about how sometimes our bodies give us an SOS whether we like it or not. That SOS is an opportunity to take stock and make changes so we can get back to the work of leading.

Today, I am talking with an incredible thinker and one of the most generous leaders I have ever met about what to do when you get slammed into that wall and need to make changes.

Richard Schwartz created Internal Family Systems (IFS) after years as a systemic family therapist and academic. This framework has been instrumental in my own work as a therapist and coach for leaders.

We dig deep into the story of his own personal journey, what led him to course-correct on his early teaching on healing, and how unchecked drive can hijack other parts of you–your playfulness, your ability to rest, and your ability to handle what comes up when you finally take a break.


Listen to the full episode to hear:

  • How we overcome overwhelm and why resistance always creeps in
  • How a near-death experience in Hawaii helped Richard to reach a better understanding of Self-leadership
  • How he was saved by his IFS practice and was inspired to bring the model to the world
  • Why Richard feels like his methodology is a powerful support in an age of gas lighting culture
  • How you can deal with all that comes up when you slow down, pause, or even have a hard stop like we all are currently experiencing now during this global pandemic

Learn more about Richard:

Learn more about Rebecca:


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